In order to eliminate an Addiction you first need to understand how it works. When you see how an Addiction controls you then you are in a position to exercise Awareness over it. From that position you can start to sabotage it.
Human beings can get addicted to almost anything: sex, drugs, rock ‘n roll, alcohol, food, weight loss, gambling, therapy, attention-seeking, shopping, stealing, wrist-slashing, surgery (think Michael Jackson), relationships and the internet. Most of what follows applies to Alcohol addiction but most of my observations equally well apply to other bananas.
The first thing to realise is that Addictions are actually obsessions. Obsessions work through tunnel vision, making the problem more important than it actually is. The key to breaking addictions is to break out of the inertia, habit and routine that comes with the addiction and connect back to Bodymind and the wider world.
Addictions are created and maintained in Headmind through a dominating Inner Voice. This Inner Control Freak can be incredibly powerful as well as seductive. It says things like:
‘Go on. You deserve it…’
‘Just the one won’t harm you…’
‘No one will know…’
‘The alternative is just too boring…’
‘You can’t make it through the night without a drink…’
‘It’s no use resisting you know you’re going to have one…’
The more you listen to the voice and follow its commands the stronger it gets. I call this ‘feeding the dragon’. The Dragon started off as a worm but grew and grew until it had you in its tentacles. Attention is its fertiliser. Disobeying it (or laughing at it/ignoring it) is its weedkiller.
If you do allow the Dragon to get a hold on you then your original liking will first turn into a habit. I have worked with many addicts over the past 20 years and it’s just weird how predictable they are. They will use the same beverages, in the same quantities, with the same people, at the same places, at the same times, every day of their lives. But it is easy to break a habit: provided you have something better to replace it with (see next article).
Once a habit turns into an Addiction (meaning that the Dragon has started to control you instead of you controlling it) at that point the problem becomes part of your Personality. Meaning that you start to define yourself as a person who is a slave to something else. This process is helped along by Alcoholics Anonymous and other ‘experts’ who use labels like ‘Alcoholic’, ‘Drug Addict’, ‘Sex Addict’, ‘Kleptomaniac’, ‘Bulimic’, ‘Narcissist’, etc. Labels like these can induce pathology and keep you in a bad place you no longer wish to be in. Drop the labels and change your personality and you will be free again.
The next thing to understand about an Addiction is that it’s not all in the mind. That there is a biological basis for the craving which is relatively easy to understand. So here goes.
When Bodymind notices that you are drinking in large quantities on a regular basis it also notices that the alcohol is depleting the brain of GABA – a neurotransmitter which regulates alertness. And when that happens it seeks to compensate by increasing GABA production. The net result will leave you feeling restless, agitated and uncomfortable. And Headmind – via your Inner Dragon – will interpret that problem as a cue for another drink….which means that, once again, you are feeding that Inner Dragon.
After a while even Headmind starts to realise that the Addiction is creating fresh problems. Like social exclusion, failed relationships, unemployment, crime, financial disaster, sexually transmitted disease, and persistent unhappiness. So it will start to worry about what happens next. But worry won’t solve anything – it just confirms your slavery. But more on that in my next article.